‘Media’ Archives
Microsoft fires Jerry Seinfeld
MORDOR, RedMonk, Thursday (NNGadget) — The Microsoft Vista advertisements starring Bill Gates as Colonel Sanders and Jerry Seinfeld as a washed-up 1990s sitcom star have been terminated. The ads are nevertheless anticipated to win many advertising industry awards and look good on the creators' resumés. Vista has sold over 140 million [...]
Phew! What a scorcher
PHONING IT IN, The Beach, mid-afternoon (NNN) — An ambulance service has praised a five-year-old boy after he successfully called 999 to report that his mother had collapsed and was unconscious in their home. In other news, a pet wears a seatbelt, alleged scientists have yet again discovered a formula for the perfect attractive woman (it [...]
New breast cancer hope for journalism
PAGE 3, Wapping, Saturday (Norks News Network) — A new breast cancer treatment has led to new hope for newspaper proprietors being able to run more pictures of topless women with one hand over their breasts. The story follows mere days after earlier stories concerning red meat, carbohydrates, drinking, high levels of daily stress and [...]
Why Obama has to get mad for us to win
PHONING IT IN, The Beach, mid-afternoon (NNN) — With the vice-presidential buzz and the Democratic convention just days away, what's most important is what Barack Obama's campaign does afterwards. Quite simply, he needs to create a more compelling narrative on change and get angry about something. Our ratings depend on it. It's August, [...]
