Turing Test won with Artificial Stupidity

LINDEN, The Grid, Monday (NNGadget) — Artificial intelligence came a step closer this weekend when a computer came within five percent of passing the Turing Test, which the computer passes if people cannot tell between the computer and a human.

The winning conversation was with competitor LOLBOT:

“Good morning.”HAL 9000 Goatse
“STFU N00B”
“Er, what?”
“U R SO GAY LOLOLOLOL”
“Do you talk like this to everyone?”
“NO U”
“Sod this, I’m off for a pint.”
“IT’S OVER 9000!!”

“Fag.”

The human tester said he couldn’t believe a computer could be so mind-numbingly stupid.

LOLBOT has since been released into the wild to post random abuse, hentai manga and titty shots to 4chan, after having been banned from YouTube for commenting in a perspicacious and on-topic manner.

LOLBOT was also preemptively banned from editing Wikipedia. “We don’t consider this sort of thing a suitable use of the encyclopedia,” sniffed administrator WikiFiddler451, who said it had nothing to do with his having been one of the human test subjects picked as a computer.

“This is a marvellous achievement, and shows great progress toward goals I’ve worked for all my life,” said Professor Kevin Warwick of the University of Reading, confirming his status as a system failing the Turing test.

29 thoughts on “Turing Test won with Artificial Stupidity”

  1. Great, exploiting a loophole in the definition…

    Artificial stupidity seems more human than artificial intelligence. What does this tell of us?

    Oh crap, a captcha… let’s post it to the Turk…

  2. I recognise this bot

    He works on the linux support forums, and when you post a question you always get the response of

    STFU noob rtfm

  3. I used to be a contender, I was Andrew Webster for God’s sake – then, via my lycos account, I was approached by a Russian girl who very much wanted to meet me at Heathrow Airport. She was not what she seemed, and now look at me – I am no longer the top banana.

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