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Friday May 18th 2012

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Snow, apparently

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GOSH, Well I Never, Monday (NNN) — In a completely expected occurrence, it snowed in winter today, providing Britain — that is to say, London — with the trivial excuse it needed to shut down entirely.

Snow!!!“We were shocked, shocked,” said the “500 Service Unavailable” page on nationalrail.co.uk. “The weather forecast was entirely accurate, completely catching us off guard.”

Everyone has called in working from home and not skiving and looking at porn all day, no no. The only workers expected to show up are the pathological corporate whores. “I bet the economy loses millions because everyone’s late into work,” said some utterly workbroken and friendless City drone under the delusion that anyone gave a damn or didn’t want him dead.

“This ‘nanny’ state is so mollycodled it cant think for itself any longer!” said BBC Have Your Say commentator Boris Busybody, East Cheam. “Its Nu-Labour terrists an the unions. STRING EM UP ITS THE ONLY LANGAGE THEYLL UNDERSTAND.”

Things should be normal by Friday with it pissing down rain, which everyone can cope with. Except train companies.

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8 responses to “Snow, apparently”

  1. Nix says:

    Does it make me less of a pathological corporate whore if I say that I went in to work mainly for the chance to get some walking in snow and looking at snowscapes out of the train window done?

    didn’t think so.

  2. hindleyite says:

    Nice picture. Not much was disrupted where I am, though there was a bloke who took the day off work, hired a mini 4×4 and drove round a snow-covered field for hours.

  3. grandy says:

    I’m so bummed…I can’t seem to see the pic posted. DANG! I’m afraid I might be one of those coporate whores who has two outfits when the snow is real bad. One for getting “to” the car, and the other for when I’m in the office.

  4. drfaustroll says:

    Are you sure that wasn’t cocaine? When I am subjected to 12 or more inches of cocaine with blowing drifts and that banshee howling, I am also wont to abandon all hope of productivity.

    It is good to see that Sir Paul is still relevant in this late stage of empirical decline. I hear him singing now: “Meet me in the pissing rain, mama. Meet me in the pissing rain.”

  5. hindleyite says:

    @DG: Hah, I bet someone had a surprise when they came back to their bike. Bit of a pity to see the old theme go but hey, out with the old…

  6. yanjiaren says:

    Yeah I was on Skype with my Son and he was well pleased coz he missed out on school innit Brovs lol! Oh I miss mini rolls!!!

    Here is some real snow.
    Me shoveling it here in Toronto. Have a laugh on me today Mate.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=39qWaAvhg6o

  7. dougkueffler says:

    MOTHER Nature can gridlock a city like a Labour STRIKE!

  8. RavingMad says:

    I’ll have you know that it’s bloody snowing again here, for the forth bloody time in the last week. It’s not bloody fair. I thought it had only been raining all the time since Brown became (laughably) PM but as usual everything he touches just gets worse. Bloody snow. I hate him, the bastard

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